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Relationships and Dating FAQ

August 15, 2011

1.  He says he doesn’t want a girlfriend.

This one is easy, but girls still think they can change a man.  Intuitively, girls know that if the right girl came along, a man would want a girlfriend.  Assuming they are special little snowflakes, they dive in thinking they will be the things to change him.  Could they be any more deluded?  It is true that almost any man will settle down with the right woman, but the problem is that the right woman doesn’t exist for many men.  Are you a super hot blonde with D cups, a 23 inch waist, no gag reflex, an avid Dungeons & Dragons player, need only 2 hours of boyfriend time per month and have a foot fetish?  Oh, and can you also shapeshift into a brunette with B cups and an ass as big as a black girl’s?  Nope.  Didn’t think so.  While that list may satisfy only the needs of a small fraction of men, it gives you some idea how impossible it is for any woman to meet the commitment requirements of some men.

If he says he doesn’t want a girlfriend, believe him.  Don’t be so full of yourself that you think you can change him.

2.  She’s dating another guy.

My answer depends on what you want from the relationship.

If you want sex
Pull back, give her less attention and when you do give her attention, make sure it’s in small doses.  Give her a huge rush, and then don’t call her for a week, or better yet, wait for her to call you.  Go spend your time with your friends or with other girls.

If you want a relationship and you’ve already had sex
Don’t.  Never go for a relationship with a girl who is dating other guys after you’ve had sex with her.  If she went on dates with other guys before she had sex with you, then it’s ok, but a girl is still shopping around if she’s still dating others guys after she’s had sex with you.  She’s too high risk for a relationship.  Dump her right now.  Preferably, dump her yesterday.

3.  I can’t get over him/her

This is common for men and women.  You can’t get over them because you’re idealizing them.  Remember, they’re deeply flawed just like everyone else.  Picture their daily routine.  They take dumps just like everyone else, they feel envy, they regret mistakes, they accidentally poke themselves in the eye while getting dressed in the morning.

The smoothest player I know is also one of the most misogynistic men I’ve ever met.  I’m sure he’s broken many hearts, but I wonder if these girls would still pine for him if they knew how much he hated them.  The most feminine girl I know can’t fall in love unless she’s treated like shit.  I don’t mean heavy asshole game, I mean treating her in a way that even hardened players will feel guilty about.  She’s also broken many hearts.  How would those men feel if they knew that the secret to her heart was breaking it?

4.  I can’t get a boyfriend

Your standards are too high.  If you’re very hot, maybe those standards are realistic and it’s just hard to find a man of your caliber.  For the other 95% of you, you are probably overpricing yourselves.  The world is full of nice men looking for girlfriends.  You definitely can find a boyfriend, you’re just not satisfied with the men available to you.  You want the unicorn who doesn’t exist, but you’re not a unicorn yourself.

You can choose between having sex with men who won’t stick around, or having a nice boyfriend who will.  Your instincts are driving you to get impregnated by a man who probably won’t commit to you.  If you are fine with being a single mom, then embrace those instincts.  In these modern times, a woman is perfectly capable of supporting herself and a child.  Unless you’re among the top girls in looks, femininity and personality, you will not find a man who both has game and will commit to you.

5.  I’m a good looking man with a good job, but I still can’t find a girlfriend

You have no game.  I’ve met a lot of men like you.  You assume that women think the same way men do, so you assume your height and your six-pack will get you laid.  Those things are just padding.  If you have the game to make a girl swoon, she will pick all these great qualities about you to describe you to her friends.  If you don’t have good game, then she’ll be telling her friends, “He’s great on paper, but we just didn’t click”.  You could be 5’6″, 10lbs overweight and manage a Starbucks, but if you have game, a girl will pick you over the guy who is 6’2″, in shape and owns his own business.

Learn game.

7 Comments leave one →
  1. August 15, 2011 2:32 pm

    This pretty much lays out the reason for every common dating complaint. Great article.

  2. August 21, 2011 3:13 am

    “you will not find a man who both has game and will commit to you”

    Mmm, I consider game to be the basic traits of confidence, strength, basic intelligence and dominance of a man’s given sphere; I know many men who have those. But I guess you mean the really game-polished PUA type here. *sigh*

    K: It’s definitely possible to land a man with those qualities if you aren’t hot. When I say a man with game, I implicitly mean a man with polished game who understands female psychology.

  3. August 21, 2011 12:51 pm

    As in, the Roissy type? Some of those guys play on weak parts of female psychology (like pining and jealousy) so their minds are still crooked somewhere along the line, even sometimes mistaking what women lust for and what they need (all women need a strong guy, but they don’t need a guy who’s a proud jerk, even if they lust for him). Other guys might be more empathetic towards women without detecting, or trying to, any female trait that comes up to work to their advantage; I’d prefer the latter. Thanks for the clarification, that’s good ressurance 🙂

  4. imnobody permalink
    September 8, 2011 7:02 pm

    “You can choose between having sex with men who won’t stick around, or having a nice boyfriend who will. ”

    I put it this way:

    “The woman chooses the man and the man chooses the length of the relationship”

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